Monday, April 15, 2002

 
music: none (terry is asleep)
I'm sitting here lost in the vast empitiness that is my existence.The darkness envelops me like nothing ever has before. I am still very happy with my fraternity. The guys there are becoming my brothers quicker than I ever imagined they could. As it sit basking in the warm glow of my computer screen, I wonder, why? Why have i been given this chance at life? Does someone above want me to suceed? or is this just my only chance and i am screwing it up as we speak. Why have i been given the opportunities that i have? is there a purpose to my existence? Deep in my heart i believe that there is a reason y i am here and y i am suffering through all this bullshit ( and that it is for the greater good of the human race ) but it is easy to git things out of proportion mentally when faced with adversity. In the words of a group of a great philosopher known as Scott Staph....What's this life for.....................? I don't know.....Why is it we yearn for something so greatly, and when we get it we nurture it to our best extent, but after time the "new" wears off and things change so radically. To quote Linkin Park "Things aren't the way they were before..." While this is not comfort to my aching heart it is the truth....I will be very happy to leave cincinnati on june 6th (or 14th depends on "fun" week) but i know there will be shit waiting for me in cleveland ready to ambush me at my weakest moment.....For some reason right now i am not looking forward to anything except Fiji Island....That is bad because it is just a party, but it is probably the only thing I have left to look forward to until that fateful day when Cleveland is graced with my prescence knowing that i will only leave to go to canadia and back here to cincinnati.....I'm not sure i am looking forward to next year yet only time will tell.....What i do know is that if i don't git my grades up high this quarter there won't be a next year in cincinnati for me....Well i need to go to bed but i'm pretty sure i will post more insights into my life tomorrow.........................................
The Old Man posted this at 10:04 PM.